Sunday, January 15, 2012

8 things I don't want you to know


I think that one of the most attractive parts of social media is that you can pretend to be anyone. You can be super witty, always happy, the feisty one or any number of personas you choose to put on even though the people who know the 'real' you know that's a load of BS.

Now don't get me wrong I enjoy that aspect of anonymity as much as the next person but the blogs and YTers that I enjoy the most are actually the people who seem to share more of themselves with the rest of us. So in an effort to peel back another layer on this onion (and seriously if anyone gets that reference I'll be really impressed) here are 8 things that are true about me but maybe I'd rather you didn't know:

1. I don't drink alcohol: While I am not ashamed of this decision it always brings a lot of "but why" or "are you kidding me" reactions that make me feel put on the spot. The real reason is because I get an allergic-type reaction where I get red welts on my face but either way who cares right?

2. I'm overweight: Now we can call it plumpy, winter weight, the obvious outcome of having Syndrome X or whatever.... but if I need to shop in the "bigger" section and shops then I'm going to own that and call it what it is. Why do you think I like makeup and nail polish so much???

3. I'm well educated: In my workplace having a degree is not helpful but it doesn't diminish the fact that I spent years at university when other people were backpacking across Europe or getting started on their careers. I'm glad I did it for me but now when I tell people about my studies it just feels like bragging, plus there is always that one person who is completely hopeless at work who always tells people how smart they are (at least at my workplace there is) and I don't want to be mistaken for them.

4. I cry when I get angry: I have no idea why I do this but shit it always happens at completely the wrong time and I end up feeling embarrassed. I also cry when I'm happy so buggered if I know what is going on there.

5. I avoid confrontation: Now this may not seem like something to be not happy with but what it really means is that I let people treat and talk to me like crap and say nothing rather than having a dramatic moment. Mostly this is because I hate yelling and I mean I HATE HATE HATE yelling. It is something I am aware of and that I am working on but people often misjudge me for being weak because of it. Being confrontational is not the same as being strong... just putting that out there. I don't doubt that I am strong I just don't want to fight unless I am totally cornered.

6. I'm proud: The last time I saw my dad alive I didn't tell him I loved him because I was waiting for him to say it first. Granted I was 16 but when he died a couple of weeks later I learned a very valuable and hard lesson - being proud is very similar to being stupid. I wont ever make that same mistake again with the people I love.

7. I am a crazy cat lady: Seriously I am. I love everything about my cats - their personalities, their meows, their fur and their smells. I love paws and whiskers and their breath. I was expecting to be an old cat lady before T came along and if for any reason he leaves I expect to go back to that plan again.

8. I wear my pjs a lot at home: Look I have cats so I don't want my "outside' clothes covered in cat hair, that means as soon as I am home on go my pjs - 2pm in the afternoon I really don't care. But if you drop past my place 9 out of 10 times I'll be in my pjs - consider yourself warned.

So there you have it, some of the warts in my "warts-and-all" tale.

By the way, I let my husband read this post before publishing and he said that I was telling everyone bad things about myself and why would I do that. Well... that is actually quite simple to answer because I don't want to live in the fantasy. I don't want to present myself, my blog or what I stand for generally to be anything other than what is true. I'm not interested in being in the 'cool crowd' or being 'in' or being a hipster, at 36 all I am interested in is being me. Not to mention I am way past the point of not accepting these truths about myself. I accept thee Jac.... lol but you get what I mean (or I hope you do).

If you are feeling brave I'd love to hear some of the things you'd rather people didn't know and if you do decide to do a post please link it below.

Jac x

26 comments:

  1. Love this post! I share a bit about myself in a lot of my posts but there's some stuff I'll always keep private online I think (eg. occupation). Go the pajamas! :-)

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    1. Thanks :) I definitely keep some stuff private too - just safer that way I think. PJs forever.

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  2. I really like how honest this is- thanks for sharing! PS- I have so many friends (and my two sisters) who don't drink alcohol... people who carry on and say "OMG THAT'S TERRIBLE" can go sod off. Stay strong xox

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    1. It is a struggle to be polite about it sometimes - I'd love to tell them to sod off lol. I hope your friends and family have an easier time with it than I have at times :)

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  3. Great post Jac. I am fiercely guarded about some things online, particularly my identity and occupation. I want the freedom to say what I choose, even if it is only about a lipstick or a dress.

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    1. Thanks for your feedback lovely. I am the same about my identity and especially my occupation too. I also agree with you about wanting the freedom to talk about anything I want too :)

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  4. Great post, thanks for sharing all these things. I have to say if these are the 8 things you don't want people to know you must be a pretty alright person because they aren't even that bad haha and i mean that in a good way. You sound like a great person.

    BTW I am ALWAYS in my Pjs or lounging clothes when I am at home. The first thing I always do when I get home is change so you're not alone there haha

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    1. awww thanks Hannah. I do like to think I'm a good person and I get the feeling you are too :) It's also nice to hear another pj wearer come out and say hi - we have to unite!

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  5. Aww thanks for sharing Jac - we all have our vices, our skeletons in the closets and things we rather not share with others but it is these same things that make us special and unique and irrevocably the one and only us.

    So celebrate that you are not the same as your colleauge and friends and know your strengths, weaknesses and use that knowledge to make yourself a better you!

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    1. hey lilpil- we certainly do have vices - and thank god for that! Definitely trying to celebrate my "jac-ness" and hope others feel inspired to do the same x

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  6. I loved reading this post - honesty is a beautiful quality. BTW we share a few "bad" traits: I'm the proud parent of two hairy purring babies myself, and I'm non-confrontational particularly at work - I'm the teddy bear who wants to be loved by everyone...

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    1. Thanks Vita - I like to think honesty is attractive too. Also glad to hear we share some of those 'bad' traits even if they aren't really bad at all lol.

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  7. Go the pyjamas! I even have night pj's and day pj's so I at least feel like I'm getting dressed every day. I work from home in my own company so my dress code is either super comfy or super comfy and work safe. I'm a lushly padded girl myself and I refuse to be squished up in my own home.

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    1. OMG I bow to the queen... day and night pjs? I must consider this and how it can revolutionalise my life. And definitely saying no to being squished at home or anywhere else. I am Anti-squish ;)

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  8. Great post! One of my bad traits is a big mouth (like a certain Donkey) so most people already know my love affair with pjs and my local supermarket staff have prob never seen me in anything but flannelette. I also cry when I get angry and flustered, but can't when I'm actually sad. Weird, huh?
    I'm also v disorganised and yo-yo diet like a mo-fo. Not attractive traits.
    Good on you for sharing, I always enjoy blogs more when I know more about the person behind them.

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    1. Michaela thanks for sharing your comment made me smile and whoo hoo on sharing some of your traits too. I was so happy (gee that makes me sound mean but you know what I mean) to see you mention crying when getting angry - I thought I was alone on that one. Been there with the yo-yo dieting too until I finally had a hiss with that, I'm sure you'll find a plan you can stick to whenever you are ready :)

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  9. This is a really brave post! I do think most of us bloggers, YouTubers, and whatever else do tend to not be so forthcoming.

    I know I may seem that way, but for me it's more about privacy, and the fact that my blog is really just about makeup. (Unless you count my second blog!)

    I do second the thing about confrontation though. I tend to think things rather than saying them, and end up regretting it in the long run. Sometimes things need to be said even if people don't want to hear them. I do of course have my blunt moments though!

    Good on you for having the guts to do this post!

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    1. Thanks Vintage. I definitely think we need to protect our identities online which is why I never really mention much about where I live or what I do.I also think we should only share what we are comfortable with - as little or as much as that is. I love the pictures you feel comfortable to share on your second blog.
      Grr on confrontation - I often regret not saying something or only think of something to say hours later when it's all done and dusted. So annoying

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  10. oh I love this post Jac. You are amazing, and I love you a little bit more because you said all of this.
    The bit at the end is great too, the only thing that you need to do in this world is like yourself.

    (I have also had people get the shits with me for not drinking alcohol - I don't drink often, and if I do not a lot - and I HATE it. what is with the drinking culture?)

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    1. Oh Tegan you made me teary (happy tears I think) -thanks so much for your lovely comment. It's been a long journey towards self acceptance but I like to think I am more than half way to my destination- god I hope I am lol.

      Not sure what it is about the drinking - mostly I just think it's thoughtlessness - or again maybe I hope it is. At least we remember everything being sober :)

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  11. Yay for PJs, I do this a lot especially on crappy weather days haha :D don't be ashamed of your education, you worked hard for it, flaunt it ;) I wish I had an education and cats!!! I WANNA BE A CRAZY CAT LADY!!!

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    1. Hey Jadeski :) You are right about my education, I need to be more proud about it. Yeah I would love to hang out with you and 20 cats in our pjs. Date for 20 years? ;)

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  12. Just got to this now...so behind on my feed...sigh!

    Loved this post!!! You just write such good stuff, you know? I love your blog. Lets see some stuff about me:

    1. I have a bit of a complex about my weight, I have an identical twin sister who is about 10 kilos lighter than me. Well, less now...but it's always made me feel bad about myself, like I'm not good enough

    2. I'm a crazy bird lady. I have a cockatiel and feathers everywhere

    3. I cry when I'm mad too. And I shake. It took me ages to figure out that I was actually mad, not upset when it happened. I used to work in an Emergency Dept as a clerk and when pts would scream at me I'd just start shaking with anger.

    4. Not a big drinker. My ex boyfriend was and always made me feel like a nerd for wanting to be the sober driver when going out.

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    1. Thank you so much Peta :) The idea that anyone even cares what I write is just awesome.

      1. Having a twin or even a sibling is something I'm kind of glad I don't have as I would always be comparing myself to them. Have to say though that weight does not determine if you are awesome or not :)

      2. Go the birds. I find them creepy but people think that way about cats lol.

      3. So glad it's not just me and that would have been so challenging in that job too.

      4. Yay for the sober ones! I hate when people make us feel bad for not bothering but quite frankly it's so expensive I'd rather spend that cash on nail polish.

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  13. Hey lovely, I awarded you a Versatile Blogger Award :)
    http://xiheartmakeupx.blogspot.com/2012/01/versatile-blogger-award.html
    xx

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    1. Oh - that will teach me not to check out my blog for ages. Thank you!!! Going to look at your post now x

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